We are expecting our first major freeze in the next few days. Ironically, I had the AC back on yesterday and today.

I do love the changing of the seasons. There’s something nice about the world around you looking different as the year progresses. It seems soon there will be little green to see in the landscape.

Tonight was Creative Sisterhood and it was a great evening. It’s hard to believe we’re into our 10th year, now.

Otherwise, I’ve been occupied with various projects. I was house-sitting for some friends the last few days. Last night was my first night back in my house for a little while. It’s good to try on other people’s lives every once in awhile. But, I”m happy to be back in my own space.

Work continues to go well. I’m really blessed to have wonderful clients with interesting projects.

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Tonight was Creative Sisterhood. Although I generally bake something and serve hot tea, I could not convince myself to turn on the oven. The last time I paid attention to anyone mentioning the temperature they said 103. I wasn’t interested in that, so I stopped listening. My neighbor told me today was the 25th day of temps over 100. I don’t know if that’s correct or not. We’re all a little mad from the heat, as people in multiple parts of the country are, so it’s certainly plausible.

Anyway, tonight we had a peanut butter pie that doesn’t require baking. I’m just not going to think too much about the cool whip and cream cheese that went into it. Needless to say, it was yummy. I can’t take much credit for that – it’s not really baking, it’s more “mixing.”

The conversation was wonderful, as usual. Only four of us were here, but it was a nice evening.

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Six years ago this month – or has it been seven – I emailed a few friends and asked if they’d like to come together every month to share with each other. My original thought for what I dubbed, “Creative Sisterhood,” was that we would make things together.

But, very quickly, it morphed into something different, something better.

Over the years we’ve shared some amazing times together. We’ve supported each other through deaths, marriages, job changes and more. Relationships have started and ended in that time. Through it all we’ve kept meeting every month, sharing our thoughts, our dreams, our selves.

It has been a really important part of my life. The mix of people was right. When forming a group there’s an art to who you invite. You want people who are similar enough the group can “gel” but with some differences that will add enough spice to keep it going.

I tried to form another group, which didn’t work. I knew it included a lot of really divergent personalities and that it would have been amazing if it worked out, but it just never came together as a group. But, I learned some really important things in the process.

For this sort of a group to work, I think:
*it has to have a “home” – hopefully someone’s actual home, but definitely a place where it can become a group, a place it can call home
*everyone has to commit to the group – you can’t have people who are showing up only very occasionally – groups can’t become groups that way – and it’s not fair to the other members – the “group” deserves being respected enough by all members for them to be present and engaged – obviously, situations will present on occasion when it’s unavoidable for someone to miss and that’s understandable
*people must share themselves – unless people share their real thoughts and feelings the group can’t ever become a group – people are want to hide behind stories of their families, jobs and other “acceptable” fronts – a group will never develop a personality of its own if the people who are in it are not present
*although it seems like a minor thing, sharing food together bonds people – there’s something about breaking bread together – or cookies, as the case may be
*having some rituals for the group help define it – they will develop naturally if you’re on the look out for them
*someone has to take the responsibility for the group – as much as we’d like to believe such things just happen, they don’t – someone has to take responsibility for it
*it’s good to take a moment occasionally to assess if the group is fulfilling a need in the lives of its members

In my original email, I used this quote to sum up that I was looking to share some of the journey with others.

We are all wanderers on this earth.
Our hearts are full of wonder,
and our souls are deep with dreams.
-Gypsy proverb

I’m wanting more interaction that’s meaningful, like Creative Sisterhood is. I’ve been thinking about trying to gather some folks for another group. Of course, it would not be the same, and a different group would create something different, but it could be womenderful. I keep mulling over the list of people I know who might be open to such a thing. We’ll see what develops..

Tonight was Creative Sisterhood. I had picked the daffodils the other day when snow was predicted and once I put them on the table, it seemed I should go with a yellow theme – all spring-like.

That train of thought led to lemon curd, which I knew would be so pretty in a white dish. As Teresa said tonight, once you start imagining how it’s going to look in a particular dish you might as well go to the kitchen, because you’re making whatever it is. And I could see that lemon curd in that bright white dish on that deep green tablecloth. It looked just like I thought it would.

Creative Sisterhood was great. We laughed heartily tonight. I think some of it might have been at my expense, but all in good fun.

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Tonight was Creative Sisterhood and it was a very nice evening.

I had the day off today so I had time to putter around the house a bit, which was great. I had lunch with Trish, but other than that I was pretty much home tidying up a little and working on some projects.

Last night I baked a new cake to share with Creative Sisterhood. I’m not generally a big fan of cherries, but I love this cake. It’s wonderful.

Cherry Chocolate Cake

1/2 cup butter
1 1/2 cups white sugar
2 eggs
1 teaspoon vanilla extract
1/2 cup unsweetened cocoa powder
1 3/4 cups cake flour
1 1/4 teaspoons baking soda
1 teaspoon salt
1 (21 ounce) can cherry pie filling

Cream butter and sugar, then mix in eggs and extract. Add remaining ingredients and mix. Pour into 9 by 13 pan and bake at 350 degrees for about 30 minutes.

Frosting
1 c. sugar
1/3 c. milk
5 tbsp. butter
1 c. chocolate chips

Mix sugar, milk and butter in saucepan and boil for one minute, stirring continuously. Add chocolate chips and stir until melted. Pour over warm cake.

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Last night was Creative Sisterhood and it was a nice evening. For the first time in awhile we were all here and it felt great to have the whole group gathered around.

I’m so thankful for these women and this space in which to be open-hearted. Continually I’m reminded of how rare it is to be really heard, to have people really listen to you, and interact with you with pure spirit. I am so fortunate to have these women in my world.

In January we generally celebrate birthdays since three of the five have January birthdays, with the others of us in December and November. I gave each of them one of the handpainted notebooks I had made. I love to give something personal, that I’ve made, when it’s appropriate. And I encouraged them to use them, not to save them.

There’s a propensity of humans to “save” things and what generally happens is that while it’s being saved it becomes useless. Paper yellows, seams come apart and all the while this thing could be being used.

Notebooks are made to be written in and I hope each of them will do that. Writing is such an integral part of my life, and I find it so beneficial, I want to encourage others to do it whenever possible..

Tonight was Creative Sisterhood. Virginia wasn’t able to be here but the rest of us gathered. It was a different kind of night, but good.

I am continually being reminded these days that listening is important. How often in life do you feel like you’re really being heard? I’m guessing it’s less often than you would like. Creative Sisterhood is always an opportunity to be heard, and to listen.

Sometimes our most important role is to listen – really listen. Way back when, when I was learning to be a journalist, one of the best pieces of advice I ever got was from University of Kentucky professor, Maria Braden. The advice was to always be listening to the answer someone gave you during an interview, instead of forming your next question. It’s a difficult thing to do when you feel you’ll be judged on the quality of your questions.

In various jobs I had – in TV, radio and print – multiple people complimented my interviewing skills. I wanted to take credit, as if I had invented some new way of asking questions. But I knew it was just because Maria Braden lived in my head, gently shaking her finger at me when I had the urge to jump in with another question too soon.

When you really listen, occasionally you hear a barely perceptible hesitation when a person is deciding if they should give voice to a story that hasn’t been told until that moment. It’s an honor to bear witness to that. And it only happens when you listen. Really, really listen. And pause.

There have been times I was holding my breath in those pauses, waiting for what was next, hoping I was capable of doing justice to the story being formed. When people tell their real stories, they share their souls, something that must be treated with respect.

One of the things I’ve learned, that I would share with students if I were in the position Maria Braden was, is that people have sometimes been wanting to tell their stories for a very long time. They’ve just been waiting for someone who would listen. Really listen.
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