CAUTION – LANGUAGE
So, what do you think of when you hear the term, “Farm Girl?” I heard it used today in a derogatory manner, and it never occurred to me before that it was a negative term.
It was one of those classic situations where you never know who’s around and what their background is. I was at the round table at Roy’s BBQ and there was another regular there with some guests. We nodded at each other, as one generally does in such a circumstance.
They went on to talk about a couple of women moving something very heavy and one of them said, “They must have been farm girls.” Derisive laughter all around, and a glance at me to include me in on the joke, as if I could not possibly be a farm girl, and would enjoy a laugh at the expense of women who know how to work hard on a farm.
People are often telling me I’m a little “prissy,” and I always discount that. However, I must give off that aura. Because today with my hair pulled up in a clip, absolutely no make up, old jeans and t-shirt, and my hands covered with paint, I still don’t give off the “farm girl” feeling – whatever that is – but I’m pretty sure it’s the opposite of “prissy.”
Well… I am a farm girl… Always have been… and Always will be.
I just got up and boxed up my food to leave. I didn’t want to share a table with those four guys any longer.
Now, goodness knows, I’ve stuck my foot in my mouth on more than one occasion in similar circumstances. I wasn’t going to embarrass him or his guests today, but the next time I see this guy at a chamber breakfast or a local fundraiser or something I will take the opportunity to tell him I am a farm girl. He likes me – at least he always acts like he likes me – maybe it will open his eyes to the idea that farm girls can sweep their hair up into elegant chignons as well as wear it in pigtails. We can wear heels or boots. We can go effortlessly between different worlds, without people ever knowing we’re “imposters.” You’d think that would be something a man appreciates, but apparently not any of those guys.
I’m not sure why being able to carry my own luggage, even if it is filled with “prissy” things, makes me less appealing. But, I guess it does. Well, at least to some men. My guess is that would mostly be men who are offended that a girl might be able to lift more than them, or wield a power tool better than them or drive a tractor better than them. I’m certain in the case of these men I would have that competition wrapped on the the last two, and maybe all three.
Some men prefer their women dainty and helpless. Because when their women are helpless, the men are stronger by comparison. That’s certainly true for this man’s wife – I’m always amazed the woman can dress herself and function from the way she looks to him for constant guidance.
I’m guessing there’s some compensating going on there on his part. And, yes, I did manage to get out of there without saying it, but it was on the tip of my tongue the whole time. But I refrained. Until I got in the car, where I said outloud, “Geez, I’m really sorry about your —–.”
I can’t decide if I’m more offended by the comment or amused by the compensation. It’s pretty much a toss up.
Oh well… this farm girl is going out to use a power tool now… and then carry some lumber upstairs.