Patsy Terrell

Lived fully, laughed loudly, gave generously

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October 24, 2011 by Patsy

Spirit Day

A few days ago I participated in Spirit Day. It’s a day set aside to encourage people to prevent bullying, particularly of GLBT youth. That’s Gay, Lesbian, Bi-sexual, and Trans-gendered, in case you’re not familiar with the terminology.

I know from my days working in the mental health field that GLBT youth have a suicide rate six times that of other kids their age.That’s something it seems we should take note of.

Having been the victim of unkind words and deeds in school – what we now call “bullying” – I know the pain of it. And yet, although I’m not proud of it, I have inflicted pain on others at times. It seems we are driven to find a pecking order. Those who are often at the bottom of it grasp at any opportunity to be just one rung up the ladder. I’m sorry to say I’ve been that person. Pitiful, really, but true.

I never witnessed – or participated – in this particular brand of harassment. However, everyone I know who’s gay has felt it at one time or another. I will defer to their experience. I can certainly tell you fat people are scorned – even as adults, much less as kids.

Why anyone would care who someone else is having sex with is beyond me. Unless I’m having sex with you, as long as you’re engaged in consensual acts between adults, it isn’t any of my business. People seem threatened by these things, which is difficult for me to wrap my mind around. Just because that girl likes other girls, I can still like boys. No one is going to force me to like girls instead of boys. There is no threat.

Spirit Day is one opportunity to be visible in the community – to be a voice – to be a person – saying, “Hey, do better than I did. Please. Please, do better.” Lets make a world where no one has to be on the bottom rung of the ladder.

One version of utopia.

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Epitaphs for Patsy

In a document she left behind for a good friend, Patsy listed five possible epitaphs that could be used at the time of her passing.

  • ‘Lived Fully. Laughed Loudly. Gave generously. Gone.’
  • ‘Lived, Laughed and Loved. Continuing that elsewhere.’
  • ‘Lived fully every day. No regrets now.’
  • ‘The journey continues It has been magical.’
  • ‘A magical journey so far no regrets.’

An Editorial Tribute

An Editorial Tribute

Image courtesy of Richard Crowson

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In memory of Patsy Terrell • Curated by Greg Holmes • Website by Rosemary Miller