The other night we were talking about how you say “no” to people. I’m a big proponent of being direct. I’d much rather people tell me “no” instead of telling me “not right now, but maybe later” or something less definitive. Just tell me the truth. And if the truth is “no” just deliver it unvarnished.
I used to run into this problem all the time when setting up gardens for the garden tour. I would call someone and ask and they would say, “Oh, I can’t do it this year, but call me next year.” The following year I would call and they would say, “Oh, not this year, but next year for sure so call me then.” After the third time I hear this I just say to people, very politely, “Do you just not want to do this. If you don’t, please just tell me. I only keep calling you because you tell me to call you again. If you’ll just tell me ‘no’ if that’s what you mean then I will stop calling you. It will be easier for both of us.” Even then some people just can’t say “no.” They’re wasting my time and they’re causing me to waste their time. Lets just stop it.
We were talking about this in the context of different cultures and Sharon mentioned that in Amish culture they often do not want to say “no” so they say, “We’ll see one time.” For some reason I just love this phrase. I’m going to work this into my daily life somehow. It’s just too beautiful to not use.
How will I work it in? I don’t know.
We’ll see one time.
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